Recovering From Divorce: Wasted Years Syndrome


When get divorced you should be ready for drastic changes and challenging adaptation to the brand-new changes of your life. Being busy with documents filling, agreements settling, for benefits fighting, you feel that your routine has a certain aim and is full of sense, but when it all comes to the end the situation becomes different. You are left with the realization that all your efforts and years of family-building have passed away and you are left with nothing to hold on. The difference is that you are neither young nor enthusiastic as you used to be before the marriage. And the most obvious outcome of the situation is loneliness and disappointment about the wasted years you are left with to the end of your days.

Putting up with such a scenario is not a way out. You need to overcome the challenge and reach your personal balance and happiness whatever it takes. But what is the recipe? Let’s discover it together.

What is Wasted Years Syndrome

The first step to the problem solution is understanding its essence. The wasted years’ syndrome is a common problem for divorcees, but usually, people don’t take it seriously mixing it with depression and devastation after the divorce process. Yet, the syndrome has its certain prerequisites, conditions and outcomes and has to be dealt with to save a person from loneliness and self-isolation.

  • Collection of conditions – there is a set of conditions that evokes the wasted years’ syndrome and makes it more vivid. The syndrome is characteristic of people who take marriage and family as a central life value. This is not bad, yet such people are more vulnerable to the state of loneliness and divorce in general. More to this, if you are not the one to initiate the divorce, the feeling of grief and devastation will be even stronger. The lack of support or the wrong surrounding which force you to fit some wild standards will only make the situation worse. So, being overwhelmed with such conditions, there is no wonder that a person is ruined with the outcome.
  • The sixth stage of grief – five stages of grief are a usual process for people overcoming challenging stages in their lives. Even if you are through with the best online divorce, when you have nothing to live for afterwards, you are to pass all the following stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. Yet, many people claim that another stage should be added, most divorcees usually suffer from – remorse. Remorse is a deep regret of the wasted years on the relationships which left you with the pain and nothing more. When the realization comes, that all the efforts, feelings and best years of your life you committed to relationships are wasted, you have no point to seek and fight happiness and love, since they seem pointless.
  • The “finity” of years – another fact that add to the wasted years’ syndrome is the realization of the “finity” of years. In most cases, the marriage takes away the best years of life, full of inner and outer beauty, efforts, enthusiasm and eagerness to live and love. When it all goes away, you are left with lower chances to attract someone, less enthusiasm and desire to try hard, so the loneliness seems to be the most obvious perspective. More that you understand that you have not much time to live, and there is no sense to start a new family.

How to Cope with the Syndrome

Any sensible person, offline or online divorce help will tell you that no life conditions give you the right to doom yourself to lifelong loneliness and depression. There is always a reason to live on be happy and there is always a way to do it properly.

  • Find the benefits – there is always a chance to find a benefit from any situation. Even if you get divorced and your life seems to be ended, you are to find a bright side of the issues. First of all you are completely free and not bound with any responsibilities, so you can change your life any way you wish. And you are given a unique chance to start everything from the beginning and make it better since now you are experienced enough.
  • Make conclusions and move on – there is no reason to hold on the past and mourn over your wasted years and lost relationships. You need to learn a lesson, make conclusions and never repeat your mistakes again. So, when you find the strength to move on, you can prevent the hurdles and have better relationships than ever.
  • Change the priorities – your next task is to change the priorities. There is no need to concentrate on your past, on loneliness, feeling pity for yourself. You can change the focus to your self-education, boost your career, spend more time with your children or other relatives, get new hobbies, recover old interest or ideas. In the end, you will discover that there are still a lot of things to live for.
  • Plan the future – the earlier you plan your future, the earlier you write down your strategies, the earlier you find the sense to move on, the sooner you will get the results and reach your personal balance and happiness.

All in all, any life problem may be solved, if you put some efforts and et the qualitative help. If you manage to find cheap divorce online in the UK, you are to get high-quality support to go through life difficulties and move on to a better life.

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