There’s a reason why the average guy only sleeps with seven women in his entire lifetime. And it’s because most of us are terrible at organizing hook-ups.
Sure, there are some men out there who couple up early in life and enjoy decades of joyful monogamy with their partner. But there are also plenty of guys who would prefer that over a string of meaningless one-night stands.
Yet, there are a lot of single men who would choose to partake in more hookups if they could.
But they can’t.
And they usually don’t even know what they’re doing wrong.
If that describes you perfectly, fear not.
Below, we have listed the eight biggest mistakes guys make when trying to find hookups.
If you can eliminate these basic errors when you’re out meeting women, you’re most of the way to becoming that guy who gets a lot of casual sex.
After all, there are tons of women in your city who are open to hooking up, as long as the guy doesn’t mess it up like a complete doofus.
So, read on to learn how to stop getting in your own way and start getting into the panties of the women you desire.
1. Looking terrible, getting drunk and acting like a complete idiot
We’re not saying you have to look and act like James Bond to get a one-night stand.
But basic hygiene, grooming and fashion sense go a long way. If you want to hook up a lot, it’ll help if you exercise regularly, follow the basic rules of smart-casual clothing and shower before you go out to meet women.
Then, there’s alcohol. Sure, the right amount supplies the extra bravery and charisma needed to charm a woman’s pants off. Yet, so many guys overdo it and ruin any chances they had of hooking up.
Don’t be that guy.
2. They don’t look online
Online dating does get a lot of stick. There are plenty of men out there who tried it and concluded that it “doesn’t work for them.”
However, in many cases, it turned out this way either because their profile sucks, their messages are terrible or they’re using a bad website.
We’d encourage guys to look at reviews of online dating apps and websites before registering to one. There are several great websites that are available specifically for hookups. These can provide some of the easiest available opportunities for casual sex.
If you don’t know where to go check out this guide for choosing the best hookup app for you.
3. They are too blunt
It’s important to understand that even though women want sex just as much as men, women have to deal with societal pressure that makes many of them feel forced to hide their desires.
That’s why if you get too physical in the middle of the dancefloor or loudly suggest to “let’s go home and have sex,” she’s going to bat away your advances.
It’s better to find an excuse for the two of you to go home together and save the filth for when you’re behind closed doors.
4. They are too desperate
A man’s desperation can reveal itself in a number of ways. Often, he’ll be nervous. It’s common he’ll supplicate to a woman far too much. Perhaps he’ll try to turn the interaction sexual too quickly.
Either way, it’s arguably one of the biggest turn-offs for the fairer sex.
If you’re too desperate to spend time or have sex with a woman, this communicates that you don’t get the opportunity to do this with someone as great as her on a regular basis.
Women want to sleep with men who are higher status than them, so quit this desperate low-status behavior.
5. They slut-shame
You can choose to believe that women who have one-night stands or enjoy specific activities in the bedroom are low-value. That’s your prerogative.
But if a woman senses the slightest hint that you’re judgemental of hypersexual behavior, you can forget about hooking up quickly with her.
If she likes you, she’ll make you wait for sex to prove that she’s a “good girl.”
If she dislikes you…well, there was no chance of you ever sleeping with her. A lot of sexually confident women will dislike you if you engage in slut-shaming.
6. Giving off relationship vibes
When a woman is attracted to you, she’ll behave in a way she thinks will impress you.
If you’ve made it clear that being sexually free and open impresses you, a lot of women will act this way.
If you’re treating her like you want her to be your perfect, prim and proper girlfriend, she will behave like that.
So stop pretending you want to be her boyfriend if you’re just looking to hook up. It’ll backfire.
7. They don’t pull the trigger
This is likely to be the most common mistake of all.
A lot of guys are too scared to speak to a woman in the first place. Some will introduce themselves but keep it strictly platonic until the woman shows clear signs of attraction.
Then there are the guys who successfully arrange a date and/or share a kiss but still don’t lead things towards the bedroom.
This could be due to fear of rejection, the fear of being labeled a creep or the mistaken belief that all women are prim and proper princesses who don’t even enjoy sex.
Either way, it’s your job as a man to pull the trigger in a smooth yet assertive way. You’ll learn more about how not to do this in the following paragraphs.
8. Not carrying a condom
It beggars belief how many single men go out to the club–or even on a date–without carrying a condom. It’s even more shocking how many guys will try to engage in casual sex without one!
By not carrying a condom on you, you run the risk of ruining your chances with a woman at the final hurdle. That’s the best-case scenario!
The worst case is that you end up having to deal with a pregnancy or sexually-transmitted disease. If she’s letting you in without protection, how many other guys have already done the same?
Strap it up and have a great time